Friday, February 27, 2009

Dr. Ru & Mrs. Banks

I was watching an episode of RuPaul's "Drag Race" on VH1 the other night and was scared by the striking resemblance between him and Tyra Banks!  Are they the same person?!

OMFG!  His show is so much like "America's Next Top Model" (ANTM) that I almost thought I was watching ANTM.  And let me tell you, no matter how I feel morally about homosexuality,  these mofo's are FIERCE!!! Two snaps in a circle with your pinky out, baby!

I wish I could do my makeup like them.  I need their secrets.  Now, they do overdo feminity, but I guess that's because their not real women.  It is said that emulation is the highest form of flattery, but I have to admit that I am a little offended by a man who feels he can call himself a woman.  How should natural born women feel about that?  They have no uterus, no menstrual cycle.  They have to take hormones to get breasts and hips, and surgery for a vagina!!!

In all seriousness, I absolutely love Tyra!  Give it up for the black women.  (Even though she made a movie about four white teenaged girls)!  And I am pretty sure that she is a natural born female.  So, no disrespect intended.  I just think the two might be related or something! LOL

And why has Ru lost so much weight? Anyway....

Curiosity killed the cat, not Kyla!


Thursday, February 19, 2009

NEW Bible Version! KIRV

Let me start by giving you some background on this...

At my Bible study discussion group, we sit in a circle and answer devotional style homework questions. The recommended Bible translation is the New International Version (NIV), because it is supposed to be easier to relate to for today's readers.

So we are currently studying the life of Moses. His life is so monumental that it covers 5 books (which every Bible scholar should know)!

Once we get to Leviticus, it starts talking about the law and how to operate in the law. So one lady answers a particular homework question and her version uses the word "harlot" another version uses "prostitute" and still another uses "whore". So we started making jokes about the authenticity of all of these versions and how some words, thoughts, and phrases cannot be adequately translated without usually falling short of emphasis, severity, and depth of meaning. Rarely does a word find itself putting too much emphasis.

But where there's a will there's a way. Leave it up to these kids today, or some Southern woman who's had to fight all her life to conjure up a way to say it all in a few short phrases, and hit you where your heart is! So the wheels in the curious mind starti turning. What if we had an "Ebonic" version of the Bible. Since I am offended by the connotation of the word ebonic, I decided to call it the Keeping It Real Version of the Bible. Full of slang and modern colloquialisms to keep the youth enthused!

Where Leviticus talks about not uncovering the nakedness of his father's wife's daughter, we could simplify by saying something like "Don't be trying to sneak a peek at your sister, your step-sister, or your half sister, bruh!"

Words like "knew" could be replaced with "screw", "smash", or the like. "Harlot" and "prostitute" could be replaced with "slut", "chicken head", and "hoe".

Of course Heaven would get blinged and iced out! And maybe the Rastas would want the burning bush to sit comfortably in between Moses' lips.  

The twelve disciples could be Jesus' homies, round, clique, entourage, boyz, etc.  Of course a large deal of research would have to go into this, with so many areas of the country having its own vernacular.  

It was just a thought.  I know that people of color, whose primary language was never English, still struggle to fully incorporate technical grammar into our daily verbage (individual cases may vary!).  Furthermore,  I saw a billboard for a church that used a phrase from some popular rap song to try to get the youth in church!  Maybe a Bible that speaks their language might help!


Thursday, February 5, 2009

Internet Explorer - explores no more!

Dear Loved Ones,

I haven't been writing lately, so...

This is just for me to let you guys know that if you wish to view my blog, you should use Google Chrome or Mozilla Firefox as your web browser. If you use IE, you'll get an error message.

Many more works to come.